Long Distance Relationships

How to deal with being apart...

13 FEB 2020By Kandie Angel

I wanted to write a little something about being in a long-distance relationship. Its not as hard as most people make it out to be. I hear some men and women talking about how being in a long-distance relationship is hard and one or the other at some point in the relationship becomes unfaithful. As someone who has been in a long-distant relationship, it’s not that bad. It’s kind of nice not having someone here 24/7, always having to explain yourself. You don’t have the pressure of someone expecting you to always look your best because you don’t want them to think you are lazy. You can take a day off and just binge watch television all day without someone judging you for not cleaning your house or taking a shower when you first wake up, when you decide to stay in your pajamas all day.

You have the freedom to make plans without asking permission to go somewhere because your significant other already made plans for the both of you, and you also have the time to find hobbies you might like as well. You get tons of time to do all the things you want to do, that you wouldn’t normally get time to do if your partner was around all the time. Usually when you have someone around every day, you don’t tend to make as many plans with friends or family as you normally would if you were alone. There are also things that you get the chance to do, such as go back to school, get a new job, rearrange the house without anyone complaining that you moved everything, etc. There are so many things you can do a lot easier when your partner works a job away from home, or if you were single. The best part about your partner not being around, or if you were a single person, is the fact that you don’t have anyone to answer to about any decision you choose to make.

The hard, overwhelming part of being alone whether you are single, or your partner works out of town, is when you are having a really bad day. Some days, when it feels like life just keeps kicking you harder than you can handle, that’s when you wish you had someone to just hug you. On the days when something breaks, and as you are fixing it, a light goes out. Then, you go to change a bulb and there isn’t one. You decide to go to the store, but you forget your wallet. That is just a few examples of days I have had and wished I had someone to just come up and give me a big hug. There are also days where you are relaxing on the couch watching a really amazing movie, and you want to start discussing the movie with someone. There is no one there to relax or cuddle with you, so you sit alone watching a movie, wishing that you had someone to lay next to you and stroke your hair to let you know that you can feel safe.

Being alone has its advantages, but it also has its disadvantages. Not having someone there to help you with little tedious things around the house that you just don’t feel like doing, or when you don’t feel good, and you just want someone to take care of you, that’s when it tends to suck. Some of the advantages I would say would have to be when you get the whole bed to yourself, without someone stealing the covers, and no one is around to take you last piece of favorite dessert, etc. It’s nice not having to share all these things with others because then you only have to worry about doing things for yourself, but at the same time, it can be very lonely if you don’t keep yourself busy during that time apart.

As for my situation, my fiancé is overseas, and isn’t going to be back fulltime until October. The way we make it work though, is making sure we keep full open communication while he is away. We video chat daily, we text and call through the day to let each other know that we are thinking of the other. We try to send cute message and pictures to remind the other that we love one another, and we try to always think of the other person before making any major decisions, even though we are apart. We make sure to include the other in each of our daily routines, that way we feel like we are still close through the distance.

When you love someone, no matter how much time, or no matter how far apart, you will always make time to let that other person know you are thinking of them. The relationship isn’t as hard, when the two of you are working together to make it a bit easier for the other. It also makes a world of difference when the two of you try your best to give the other that time even though you might be thousands of miles away, or even a town over. If you truly love someone, nothing will stop the two of you from being together. Not another person, time, nor distance can break that couple apart. The only way it can be ruined by any outside factor, is if one you choose to let whatever it is trying to break the two of you apart happen.

If there ever is a time in your relationship where you feel as though something isn’t right, then talk to your significant other. The best way to keep a relationship healthy, is by keeping open lines of communication, and always being honest with that other person no matter how bad the truth hurts. If that relationship is meant to last forever, it will!

Until next time,

Blessed be!